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E-Mailbag for
June 29, 2002
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RK3K wrote:
Look, I see this is stupidly crazy about fighting
over the darn new video games. "Gamecube is lame!!" "X-Box's stupid!!!" "Ps2 is
nonsense!!" THE FIGHTING OVER NEW VIDEO GAMES IS JUST TOO GOD-DANG STUPID. The
NEW video game
BASHING......IS.......NEEDED.....TO......BE.....OVER......WITH.......RIGHT.......NOW!!!!!
DANGIT. Bashing is just "HECK NO!!" ways!! People just need hearts of games
please!!! And bashing is nothin' to LORD!! What if people who got after people
who hate NEW video games? What will happen? (1. I'm not talking about the site,
I'm talking about the dangers of bashing new video games. 2. NEVER I bash new
video games. 3. I like Gamecube okay? But I'm not bashing the NGC, X-BOX OR PS2,
but NGC is cool.)
| BeckerManEX:
Okay, we understand. I myself have been known to bash the PlayStation2 and the
XBox for their respective reasons, but seeing that the PS2 is now only $200
bucks, and there are some killer games I would love to play, I could be tempted
to pick one up near the end of the summer. As for the X-Brick, er, XBox, I don't
think I will be getting one, unless those rumors about Rare are true....
|
| Hairball: I think that
the video games are just trying to be "cool" and the "coolest" one gets the most
sales, at least that seems to be how the new kids are thinking. Most people
can't afford more than one system, so they may get the one that the most cool. |
| TW: Everyone's entitled
to their own opinion, but X-BOX DOES SUCK ASS! BILL GATES sh**TED IT OUT!!! - I
saw an image of that in a magazine, haunted me for life (maybe not) |
| SolarGamer:
GOD! If there is one thing I don't like it is the bashers who bash the
bashers...I don't know what country you are from jackass but in AMERICA it is
our god given right to bitch and complain without anyone hassling us about it
for doing so. Why don't you go back to the Middle East buddy, where all the
smelly hairy idiots live (not to say all the people in the Middle East are like
that...(even though they are.)) |
| Tiger: Haha, but you
see, I have betrayed Nintendo! I have recently bought a PS2! YES THATS RIGHT!
That is my first new console..the last one I had was an SNES! What can you say
about that? But the GameCube rocks. If only I had more money.. |
| Homer:
And Atari 2600 is wicked!!! |
Sick Bastard wrote:
Solar Gamer was a great lay
| BeckerManEX:
Your name is chosen well.
|
| Hairball: That's great,
so where's my 5 cents? |
| TW: You got laid with
solar? How nice. |
| SolarGamer:
My cock is big and my balls are round....I am talking about my chicken and my
basketballs faggot. ;) Anyways, thank you for the compliment. Although, I hear
that quite frequently from both guys and girls. Why limit the love you can share
with only one gender after all. |
| Tiger: Hm..no comment.. |
| Homer:
Yes indeed |
Al Gore wrote:
Thanks to you, I'm going to hafta shut down the
internet. (shuts the internet down)
| BeckerManEX:
Oh Al, you and your silly claims, next you will be stating you created demin
short-shorts. ::shivers::
|
| Hairball:
Ooooooooohhhhhh... I am so scared. |
| TW: You American *****,
oh yes, I wanted Al Gore to win, not Bush. |
| SolarGamer:
Yeah...ok. Riiiiiiiiight. This is the kinda joke that belongs on some 'kiddy'
web-site. Why oh why do all these little kids come to a Super Mario fan site? It
just doesn't make sense. |
| Tiger: AH? Where'd
everything go? |
| Homer:
Thanks to you too, tell Bush his free supplies of condoms will be over. |
Super Homo wrote:
I e-mailed you last time about Yoshi being a boy
and laying eggs. WHY THE HELL DID'NT YOU PUT IT ON THE E-MAIL PAGE THINGY DAMMIT!!!!
Err... If you do'nt do it this time than I'll... Well, I'll Be Pissed..... You
have been warned.....
| BeckerManEX:
It's not like we are scared of you, but we did post your letter this time.
|
| Hairball: I have said
it once and I will say it again, Yoshi is a transsexual. |
| TW: Hairball probably
determined that it's gay rating was through the roof. |
| SolarGamer:
We are sorry for not posting your e-mail in the e-mail bag, for there is a
logical explanation. We intend on doing a special that shows how both sexes of
the Yoshi are able to produce the eggs in a matter of seconds of eating
something. My theory is that all the Yoshi's are in reality hermaphrodites and
that there is no male or female gender. Be prepared for graphic pictures of
Yoshi squeezing that egg out of his ass. |
| Tiger: Oooh you made
him mad, HB! |
| Homer:
We all konw how lazy HB is, right HB? |
Pot Head wrote:
Is it true that SolarGamer is the son of Bin
Ladden
| BeckerManEX:
It might explain alot..., but, alas, no, he is not.
|
| Hairball: Yes, that's
why he has sick, sick thoughts. |
| TW: Hmm... a
conspiracy? |
| SolarGamer:
f*** no! I ain't no Arab freak. Even if Bin Ladden wasn't some homicidal maniac,
the Arab people as a whole are rather...disgusting in many regards. I take that
insult to heart. I am practically 100% German, and am proud of my heritage. Good
looks, intelligence, and a big dick are all about being Aryan. |
| Tiger: Possibly, quite
possibly. |
| Homer:
Do HB has been cybering with a terrorist the whole time? |
Jonny wrote:
Great site.
Katie will you f*** me?
| BeckerManEX:
So forward, you didn't even try taking her out on a date first to "warm her up
ot the idea"
|
| Hairball: She probably
will if you give her a good ride... and some money. |
| TW: I don't know who
this "Katie" is. |
| SolarGamer:
Katie? Who the f*** is Katie......ohhh Katie. See people, that is why it is best
to at least know the first name of the person you are sleeping with on those one
night stands. Don't worry Jonny I am sure Katie will give it up for
you...although prostitutes aren't exactly the tightest mother f***ers for people
whose dicks are rather, how shall I put this, below average. |
| Tiger: HB! You really
dont filter out these things do you.. |
| Homer:
Who's Katie? |
Crono38 wrote:
Nice April Fool's joke. Har har. It would've been
harder to tell that this was fake if you had found sprites from the GBA version
instead of putting sprites from the SNES version in screens of the GBA version.
| BeckerManEX:
We didn't want to make it impossible and from all the slack we got about your
Luigi in SM64 from a couple years back, we wanted to make it somewhat obvious.
|
| Hairball: The GBA
emulator doesn't work as well as the SNES emulator. |
| TW: Oh har har, bloody
hah. |
| SolarGamer:
Where's your web-site f***er? Thought so. Since, you are probably fat and
ugly...I will not insult you at all. See people I AM a nice guy...especially to
those of you with pathetic lives. |
| Tiger: Yeup, thanks to
our good ol April SM128C committee. |
| Homer:
Its all TWs fault! |
Guy3421908wrote:
i need help! i tried the new code a million times
to get the secret levels in SMW for GBA, but it doesn't work! i've beaten all 96
levels too! what am i doing wrong?
| BeckerManEX:
Nothing, it's fake.
|
| Hairball: The only
thing you did wrong is sending that e-mail to SM128C. |
| TW: I think you'll find
that it was an April Fool's Joke, and the code doesn't work. You are the weakest
link, goodbye! |
| SolarGamer:
Laughing my ass OFF! This poindexter actually plays Mario games. How old are you
little boy? Why don't you go ask your mommy nicely how to do it. Now you be a
good boy and try not to get spanked. |
| Tiger: Maybe you need
to read the date on the article. |
| Homer:
That was an April Fools trick, you must be very dumb to not figure that out by
now. |
Sarah wrote:
Je veux download mario bros parce-que sa fait
longtemps que je essais de le download cest toute ok, merci bye
| BeckerManEX:
I caught "Mario Bros." and "Download" but download what, I'm not sure.
|
| Hairball: Je ne parle
pas francais. Oh wait, it looks like I just did. |
| TW: Je ne sais pas. |
| SolarGamer:
It is a proven fact that French people don't bathe and that they stink. . .
.That is all. |
| Tiger: No speako
Frencho. |
| Homer:
Je ne comprand pas |
Ryan wrote:
In Super Mario World (GBA), after you collect all
of the dragon coins, Yoshi's house will have a block that says, "I am out
playing with my friends, I hope to see you again,
Super Dragon Yoshi."
Is it possible to see or get Super Dragon Yoshi?
| BeckerManEX:
I don't think so, then again I haven't played through the whole game.
|
| Hairball: How is Yoshi
not a Super Dragon? |
| TW: I haven't played
Super Mario World, or Super Mario Advance 2 |
| SolarGamer:
Yes, but not the way you would expect. My way involves smoking a lot of pot. But
not just any pot mind you! You have to smoke the cannabis indica, other wise
known as "kush". E-mail me so I can mail you the hook ups and I promise you that
you will be seeing a lot more than a Super Dragon Yoshi. Do you puff the magic
dragon? |
| Tiger: Yes, just keep
on mashing the buttons. |
| Homer:
Never played it, ask HB |
Amy wrote:
How do I catch the eggs that Birdo throws in
Super Mario World ?
| BeckerManEX:
Jump on top and lift them up, then proceed to throw them back at him/her.
|
| Hairball: First off,
there is no Birdo in Super Mario World, but if you mean Super Mario Bros. 2,
just jump on top of the egg, and press the dig button, and you'll pick up the
egg. |
| TW: Birdo is in Super
Mario World? Thought he was just in Super Mario Bros.2 - look above then. |
| SolarGamer:
What the hell is a 'Bird O'???? I swear Hairball attracts all the tweekers. |
| Tiger: You get on top
of em and pick em up, simple as that. |
| Homer:
Dunnno, ask HB |
Jack wrote:
WHEN IN F***ING HELL ARE YOU GOING TO F***ING
UPDATE YOU F***ING VAGINAL BLOOD FARTS? F***ERS!
| BeckerManEX:
Harry, why would you even post this?
|
| Hairball: Nooooooo...
MY VIRGIN EARS! Don't ever, ever, hurt my feelings like that again, you
heartless son of a bitch. |
| TW: You just missed it,
it was on the 30th June. Goodbye. |
| SolarGamer:
I agree with you on all accounts Jack. However the vagina must never be used in
insults of that disgusting nature. You should love and worship that gateway to
heaven and NEVER use its name in vain. Please PLEASE do not corrupt these young
people's minds that the vagina is anything but beautiful. Show some respect man. |
| Tiger: HB really doesnt
like to use filters, does he.. |
Homer:
HB WILL F***ING UPDATE THE F***ING SITE WHEN
HE F***ING FEELS LIKE TO. |
Sonic wrote:
There is one thing I have learned after visiting
the site recently......never trust staff members telling you things are coming
on an exact date i.e. Super Mario Saga.
| BeckerManEX:
I have nothing to do with that, I just do the bag, and post on the board
sometimes, I have had to take a backseat roll in the site since my site,
Entertainmentopia, has really taken off.
|
| Hairball: Life is full
of delays, but like us, you shouldn't trust Nintendo either, since when did THEY
do anything on time? |
| TW: SolarGamer is a
very..... busy man. |
| SolarGamer:
That is NOT my fault. That is Hairballs. But don't worry Hairball learned his
lesson. He learned it good. Oh boy did he learn it good. BEOTCH. |
| Tiger: It's all Solar's
fault! I swear! |
| Homer:
Haha, you shouldn't trust anything we say either. |
Yoshi wrote:
My site
http://www.geocities.com/yoshi_dragon1016/ Please check it out and give any
comment possible. PS Please email back as soon as possible thank you. Yoshi
| BeckerManEX:
Null |
| Hairball: Oh my, that
is one of the gayest Yoshi sites I have ever seen. |
| TW: Get off Geocities.
Geocities is evil! And you stole the BG image for the splash from the crappy SMT
site. I like your in-depth summary of SMB1&2 especially, so much amazing detail
on every aspect of these classics. |
| SolarGamer:
I honestly didn't look at your site because I have better things to do and more
questions to answer. Let me assure you though that I am positive that it sucks
ass and that a chimp on crack could make a better site with only one hand
available while jacking off. |
| Tiger: Nopety nope,
didn't visit it. |
| Homer:
The main page already makes me want to close my Internet Explorer |
Jon wrote:
No offense or anything, but this site really does
suck. I'm not saying you suck, but theres barely any useful info.
| BeckerManEX:
You have to dig around, we have years of archived junk for you to view.
|
| Hairball: How the hell
can we NOT suck, yet the site suck? You are being contradictive in your points.
E-mails like that also contain barely any useful info. |
| TW: ... |
| SolarGamer:
Yeah okay. Thanks. Next Question. Why does this site attract homos? |
| Tiger: There's barely
any useful info in HB's brain too. Haha! |
| Homer:
And you suck too |
Sonic wrote:
Is it me or does Solargamer post more lengthy,
useless replies than any of the other responding staff in the email bag?
| BeckerManEX:
I post good replies, it has been so long since I ACTUALLY had a chance to post
some that I may have forgotten, maybe if you asked a question I could respond
with a usefull comment :)
|
| Hairball: I don't think
it's just him, just look at all the other replies, how much useful do you think
they look? Not very indeed. |
| TW: Go ahead, solar
(read next line) |
| SolarGamer:
It is the truth...but everyone loves me :). I am like Michelle on that old show
Full House. I am just so cute that I can get away with anything. Ya Goon-f***. |
| Tiger: I dunno, let's
look at his reply. |
| Homer:
Solar has very interesting replies, they are also very enjoyable to read |
Kristy wrote:
In Super Mario World, there are two worlds that
have two exits. But I have tried everything to figure it out can you help me?
The names of the two worlds are Cheese Bridge Area and The Valley of Bowser 2.
Please help me?
| BeckerManEX:
I wish I could help you, but I haven't played the game in such a long time any
help I could provide would be a combination of "ummmm"'s and "eerrrrr"'s. |
| Hairball: In Cheese
Bridge Area, you have to go under the goal, and get right back up, and if you
keep going forward, and there's the second goal. I can't remember the other
exits in Valley of Bowser 2, haven't played the game in too long. |
| TW: I haven't played
Super Mario World. |
| SolarGamer:
Boring. I will just continue to sit here playing with myself until there is
actually a meaningful question. |
| Tiger: Blargh I knew
how to do this, ask HB, he helped me. |
| Homer:
What are you really trying to ask? |
HotSoup wrote:
Why doesn't your chat work?
Is jIRC dead?
Why aren't there anymore people in the chat area?
How many Yoshi's are there?
Where are my pants?
| BeckerManEX:
Chat works just fine it finally came back online, jIRC is not dead, it should be
working as far as I know. The chat was down, it's back now. Too many to count,
and no I haven't seen your pants.
|
| Hairball: The chat room
is too "cool" for you HotSoup, we don't want you to condense up. Since when does
soup wear pants? I mean, that would look like you pissed your pants. |
| TW: 1) It does 2) No 3)
There is 6 in there as I write this 4) More than you can shake your ass at 5)
Keep Shakin' it! |
| SolarGamer:
Someone call the police! A homeless person has access to a computer! Who did you
rape and kill you bumb? ANSWER ME GOD DAMN IT! |
| Tiger: Yes, it's all
dead! Chat is GoNe..OoOOoO..oh wait, it just made a comeback. |
| Homer:
1. Our chat works now 2. You must be blind if you don't see me sitting there in
the chat room 3. I have no idea at all 4. At your local clothing store |
Impact009 wrote:
I have a few things to say about Super Mario Saga
or whatever. Solar has spelling problems. Part 11 at first it says Iggy, Wendy O
and Ludwig escaped, then all of a sudden, Bowser at night adds in Roy, and
Ludwig was captured. Is this an error? This might have serious problems on the
plot, whatever the plot is. This story makes no sense, I swear on the game
Donkey Kong the so called Pauline looks exactly like Peach. I don't think there
was a Pauline. I know Mario has no child, because he probably doesn't even know
how to have sex. And Mario still lives with Luigi in Brooklyn. I know the reason
why Yoshi's mad, it's because Mario always bashed him in Super Mario World if
you caught that. And how can there be a fire flower? Wouldn't the flower just
burn up?
| BeckerManEX:
You raise some interesting points about the plot, or lack thereof, in the Super
Mario Saga, but Solar is going to have to field this.
|
| Hairball: Are you
kidding me? Mario not knowing how to have sex? Mario's like one of the most
perverted video game characters, always trying to find ways to get some. |
| TW: (ignores first bit)
Pauline was in DK and DK2, Peach didn't come in till Super Mario Brothers. Peach
replaced Pauline in one of the G&W gallery series Donkey Kongs, and he probably
does know how to have sex, otherwise he wouldn't try to save Pauline, her sex
must have been good. |
SolarGamer:
It is SOOOOOO f***ing hilarious when someone stupid tries to insult you. I will
be the first one to say that I DO laugh at down syndrome people, however this
guy makes retards sound like Albert Einstein. Number 1: My spelling is 150 times
better than any fan-story and any articles period by almost any other fan-site
out there. Number 2: I suggest reading the parts you mentioned and you will find
that there is no "inconsistencies" like the ones you've mentioned and that you
are stupid ;). I understand that the plot is more complicated and mature than
any other Mario story ever written before and isn't some cookie cutter story in
any way, shape or form. I suggest you go watch your Saturday morning cartoons as
I am sure those plots will be easier for you to follow. Number 3: Now here is
were you prove your stupidity. Pauline is AN OFFICAL Mario character. That is
right! Her name was OFFICALLY PAULINE for the game DONKEY KONG. That is,
NINTENDO made her name Pauline (More specifically Miyamoto). DONKEY KONG took
place in Brooklyn. Princess Peach Toadstool didn't appear until Super Mario
Brothers, which took place in another dimension. This is common Mario knowledge
pal...ask anyone. Number 4: Who says Pauline doesn't have a child? She has been
missing in the video game world for 15 years now. Nintendo has never explained
what happened to her and why she is not with Mario. My story offers an
explanation. Take it or leave it as you will. Number 5: Yoshi's motivation as to
why he is mad is still a mystery. This is only the beginning to the story, for
the Mario Saga hasn't truly even begun yet. Number 6: DUMBASS! Have you ever
even played a Mario game in your life? The 'Fire Flower' has appeared in every
major Mario title EXCEPT Super Mario 64. It has even appeared in Super Smash
Brothers. Your attempts in making me sound stupid only discredited yourself even
further.
See people! This is why I am the master. If you really want to insult me and the
story you can. There are probably a million reasons why one wouldn't like it.
However people like this asshole didn't have any credibility or lost it when he
started to 'insult me' with information that is COMMON OFFICAL knowledge. Nice
try though. |
| Tiger: Hm, that email
didn't make sense either. |
| Homer:
Yeah Solar, take some English classes! |
ZZZZZZZZZ wrote:
Lets see if they really update this time.
| BeckerManEX:
We updated!
|
| Hairball: I think we
actually kept our promise, for once. |
| TW: No, we won't update
this. (rolleyes) |
| SolarGamer:
The fun part is that if we wanted to we could choose not to update in years and
you people would still be making us money each time you visit the site. |
| Tiger: Let's find out. |
| Homer:
Lets see |
I Hate Hairball, what a lazy sh** wrote:
I swear, if you don't update this mailbag,
there's gonna be HELL around here.
| BeckerManEX:
We updated!
|
| Hairball: I know, I was
too scared, so I decided to update it. |
| TW: It sure is HELL
around here! |
| SolarGamer:
Ooooo I bet Hairball is scared by your threat. Why do people think that threats
over the internet is something that will intimidate? It is almost as ridiculous
as having an 'online girlfriend', but that my friends is a whole 'nother topic. |
| Tiger: Well, we just
updated it. No hell yet. |
| Homer:
I don't see hell. |
Paper wrote:
I have some f***in' questions for your f***in'
asses to f***in' answer, or else i'll have to come the f*** over there and beat
all your f***in' asses and then all ya'll will be cryin' to yo' little f***in'
mommas you f***in' bitches... So you f***in' might as well answer my f***in'
answers and put me in f***in'the e-mail bag.......
1.Hairball is f***in' gay
2.Nintendo Gamecube isn't sh** cause it can't do sh**, so I might as well sh**
on it. But that ain't none ya' f***in' buisness
3.Gamecube is a kiddie system. Get a f***in' XBOX or a PS2.
4.You guys/girls can't manage a f***in' website, one way to tell is by goin' in
the chatroom. All you'll see is Hairball talkin' to himself. (lmao)
5.Who farted???
P.S. - Santa Clause is FAT!
| BeckerManEX:
1. Okay, 2. That didn't make no lick of sense, 3. No, I like my GCN, 4. Great,
5. Thanks for sharing dick-face. |
| Hairball: Wow, you must
be proud that you can say "f***" so many times, that goes to show how incredibly
stupid you are. |
| TW: 1) Hmm, f*** 2)
f*** 3) I f***ing well have a f***ing PS2 4) f***ing hell, this f***ing website
is f***ing great 5) You f***ing farted you f***ing sh** 6) I know he's f***ing
fat. |
SolarGamer:
Number 1: Hairball is NOT gay. He is bisexual. Number 2: You are either an
uneducated black person or a 'wigger'. It is funny when people apply their
so-called accents when typing.
Other than those complaints, I think you were molested and have now become a
pedophile. Why else would you be so caught up in the whole 'kiddie' aspect. You
f***in pedo perv. |
| Tiger: 1. Yes 2. No 3.
Sort of 4. Chatroom sUxX0rz! 5. Dunno PS. Yeup. |
| Homer:
There you f***ing go, we have f***ing put you in our f***ing email bag. And here
are the f***ing responses to your f***ing questions. 1. That is true 2. sh**ting
in a GCN will not make it better 3. Do you think we don't know that? 4. IM THERE
TOO!!! 5. Who? |
This E-Mailbag's Answers,
Responses, and Insults by: BeckerManEX, Hairball, TWgamer, SolarGamer, Tiger, and
Homer.
Send questions to SM128C's E-mailbag. To have
your question answered simply send your question to e-mailbag@sm128c.com
with "E-Mailbag Question" as the subject
line.. All good questions will be answered. Just to note Super Mario
128 Central has the right to edit any question for spelling and/or grammar.
|
